"Ces la vie" -That's Life

During the month of January I have noticed things changing. People are changing, the world is changing, the economy is changing, lots of things in this world are changing. When change happens to people it makes us more aware of just how precious life really can be. When Barak Obama was elected president I didn't know what to expect. You hear so much on the news and in church that you don't know what to think. It scared me a little cause I hear so much but know so little. The fact that he is different and not what we "the american people" is not something that we are accustomed to. It made me think that instead of worrying about the fact that something bad is going to happen because he is what people call "different" we should just put our trust in God that he knows what he is doing. I work in a Hair Salon so I talk with many different people a day with many different views. Some are scared, some are racist, some like the change, and some dont care. My personal opinion of it all is that as long as God is in control and we let him handle it I think we will all be a little worry free about it. The ecomony is down some now but maybe in a way it is God's way of telling us to slow down and think more of him than on our wants and needs. Since christmas I really feel that I have been tested in so many ways. It shows me that I as a person am changing. I got married in July, talk about change. You go your whole life depending on two people who will always be there for you and help you out to living with one person and not knows what the next day can hold for you. Its a big change! When we are children we always know that our parents are going to be there for us. Its a routine. But when you get married its not that they won't be there for you but you have to come to realization that the person you married will also be there for you. Change is hard, but change is good. I have been tested with the realization of marriage, but also realization with my intermediate family. When you get married you combine family's. Yes the two do become one in a sense but also you gain members. It can cause relationships to slip as well. I have a cousin Whom I love dearly, as a friend and family. (I do love all my cousins) But this one was one I depended on to lend an ear or a helping hand. She is my friend. But in recent weeks we ourselves have drifted so to say. As we drifted fights began, lies were spread, and things were said that shouldn't have been. I am not by any means saying that I am innocent, nor am I saying that She or I was wrong. But I realized that by all that happened I was not only losing the respect of my family but I was losing hers. I said things I regret, and I am sure she said things she regrets but its in the past now and I can't take those back. When I realized this I saw that I was not only hurting myself but her too. I have prayed about it, thought about it, and talked about it. The only thing that I can do is let God have it. He takes care of all our needs when we need him. He is our rock and our only friend we can ever trust. By me fighting with her, I saw that I myself needed to change. I am changing as a person. Somtimes changing as a person is a hard thing to do. There are many things I need to change about myself and I am now willing to let God handle it and help me change in ways that can only be for the better. Trust is something I am allowing him to take hold of. I have a hard time with it. I am always scared someone is going to leave me like my brother. Its hard. I think since he died I have held such a grudge against God and myself that I can't seem to let people in. I go on the defense. When I have something precious like my husband I just want to hold on to it and not share. I am now realizing that I need to have more trust in God and more trust in myself. I read a passage of scripture as singing the Beatles song in my head. Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven. All my life I have rushed things, rushed life. And with the rushing I never stopped to change and make things better for myself. There is a time for everything, and if we all sit back and let God have control of it our lives might be much more peaceful. We won't have to worry what is going to happen, or what someone is doing we will just let it happen and know that God is in Control.